Countdown

My bambinos have been away at their Dads house for the past 10 days...I am going through withdrawals.
I think the longest I have gone without seeing my brats is about 3 days, and that felt like an eternity at the time. I find myself missing the pandemonium that a 5 and 2 year old can create between them.

I am missing their quirks and smiles.

And I am wondering what they are seeing, doing, learning...that I am missing. I suppose this is one of the many things about being divorced that I (and the kids) will have to acknowledge and endure . I can not image what I will do if they ever go to stay for a summer.
Well, this is starting to sound a little depressing, but I am going to pick up the kids on Thursday...only one day left, wohoo!

A little something to lighten the mood:

Aye carumba

Totally cute...except for the long line of dribble down my babys chin.

Poor dear has a salivary gland issue.

Oh my.....he was plum worn out!

I know how he feels.

Off to dream land, Where 2 year olds potty train themselves, No one has to rise before 10am, Money grows on trees and calories don't count. Oh yeah, that's where I wanna be.

K

You know what really bugs me....

Those little stickers they put on apples...sometimes they don't want to come off and I really just wanna eat the apple. I mean does anyone actually look at those? What are they for?

When you've.....gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now....and after you've went you realize that there is not a bit of toilet paper anywhere to be seen.

How someone can not answer the phone when you call, even though you know they are there, they have to be there...you saw there car when you drove by just 3 minutesss a g o.........hehe just kiddinnngg.

Somehow, no matter if you commit to memory where you put something in your purse.....it will be in a different pocket when you go back to find it, if you find it. (or is this just me because I only clean out my purse once every 3.3 years?)

The sound of someone brushing their teeth...it gives me goosebumps, and not the good kind. I have nothing against good oral hygiene, actually I'm all for it....I just prefer not to hear it. *shiver*

When people speak in chat shorthand...."OMG (oh my gosh), LTNS (long time no see), LOL (laughing out loud)...soon we won't even need to actually say words, it will just be one long list of letters. (Don't get me wrong...I think it is great for the Internet, but in real life...I would be totally confused. LOL.)

What bugs you??

I will apologize in advance for this completely random post.
Adieu,
Krista

Word of the day: flagitious  [ fluh - jish - uhs ] Shamefully wicked. as persons, actions, or times. Heinous or  flagrant, as a crime.
I picked this word 'cause it sounds kind of gross, use it in a sentence. Ha!

In case you were wondering....

I am sure that the question foremost on your mind this afternoon is "what did Krista eat over the holiday?" Well I will relieve your curiosity. Since I was alone for the majority of my 6 days off (don't feel to sorry for me, I kinda enjoyed the lack of screaming bleeding children), family had all traveled out of state or were unable to travel here, I felt it important to keep up the tradition of overeating during the holidays even though the yearly feast would not be prepared in my home.

It is a burden but traditions are very important!

So let me just give you a rundown of the goodies I have ingested, inhaled, gobbled, scarfed down and or devoured over the last 6 days:
Chocolate Pie
Peach cobbler (almost an entire pan!)
12 dozen pumpkin cookies (okay, it was more like 2, but it was still a bunch)
1 stuffed crust pizza
2 moon pies
19 canned cokes...ohhh caffeine, how I love thee
Turkey pot pie
1 Bean and cheese burrito
2 hot dogs (with ketchup only, 'cause that's how I like em!)
1 strawberry shortcake roll
1/2 a box of lucky charms
1 turkey and cheese sandwich
1/2 block of cheddar cheese...no crackers...just cheese.......mmmmm
4 buttermilk biscuits
1 cheese burger
3/4 of a bag of M&M's
1 green apple with peanut butter.... cuz peanut butter makes the world go round.
1 chocolate raspberry yogurt
And a paaartriiiidge in a pearrrr treeeee.
Just kidding about the partridge...and the pear tree I guess, I don't think I could eat a tree.

Well. I am glad I got that off my chest......Is it any wonder I feel like an enormous bloated sow!?...ugh, I can hardly move or breath...I will never eat so much again...it's disgusting, immoral, not to mention painful! I am ashamed...and now I must go eat a Skinny Cow ice cream sandwich..................because it is low fat and it's important to have a balanced diet.

Krista

You'll shoot your eye out kid...

This is the Christmas gift my father bought for my son:

Yes, he bought my kindergartner a BB gun. Now, my father swears he asked me about this before purchasing the gift....I do not recall this supposed conversation, so when I brought up the need for parental consent the conversation went something like this:
Dad: I asked you and you said yes.
Me: No.....you did not.
Dad: Yes, I did
Me: NO you DID NOT!
Dad: YES I DID!
(we always handle disagreements in a very adult manner)
Me: I don't think so
Dad: I mentioned it a few months ago and you said sure.
Me:......SURE?! that means yeah right, sure, uh huh...as in he is only 5, maybe when hes older.

Jeez, can't people read between the lines??
Well its done now and Colin loves his gift. I will also say that my Dad is very careful, teaching Colin all the rules and safety related to using a BB gun, and he will not allow him to use it unsupervised.


*Sigh* I just hope this does not lead to any ER visits....and if my father ends up with BB's in his hind end I will try my darndest not to say...I told you soooo.
Love you Dad
Krista

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, Seasons Greetings...and all that stuff

It seems my previous concerns for my hygiene and possible loss of one or more toes to frostbite may have been slightly exaggerated. The total snowfall for my area was...... less than 1 inch. It was a lovely white Christmas that melted away by 3 PM for the most part...Perfect!
Now I spent the day with my Grandmother, making turkey pot pie and chocolate cream pie...I made meringue for the first time in my whole 25 years of life! Thanks for the lesson Grandma! We stayed busy with cooking or chatting and it helped to keep my mind off the fact that this is the first Christmas my monsters have not been with me..*sniff* *sniff*...but I did talk to them on the phone and they seem to be having a good time at their Dads house.
We had our family Christmas on Thanksgiving as that was the Holiday when everyone could get together....here are a few pictures

Opening gifts.
Sorry it is a little blurry...and dark


Cousins


My brat


Look at that expression! Love this picture.

Little angel.

Hope everyone had a wonderful, merry, chaotic Christmas..full of love, laughs, lots of pie, screaming children, afternoon naps and piles of wrapping paper.

Krista

It's me again Margaret...

Merry Christmas Eve!
Two posts on consecutive days! That like totally never happens anymore....must be all this free time......that I've filled with educational television, reading Kafka, learning Latin, and exercising at least 6 hours a day......You know, the norm.

Anywho, we are supposed to get some 1-3 inches of snow at some point this evening...I am a little excited, it has been a few years since I have seen real snow.

I may not be quite so enthusiastic if we get the 6 inches my Grandmother is predicting and the electricity goes out...and I have to cook (over an open fire no less!) everything in the freezer before it begins to smell and grow hair.....and I have no water to flush the toilet or bathe... and no heat to keep my toesies warm (toes are very important for balance and I am balancely(not a word?? I don't care) challenged I trip over nothing walking down the hall, I can't imagine the klutz attacks if I lost any toes to frost bite!). I am sure it will be fine, I'll be fine....Just fine...out here....all alone...in the country....with only 2 dogs and a 11 chickens to depend on.
I know, I know...I am an eternal optimist, it's just the way I was born.

Well now that I have recovered from my attack of melodrama...I have those now and then...I have to go bathe, make sure I have enough clean clothing, enough drinking water and find several extra blankets...Just in case.
Krista

Long time no blog

Oh my, has it really been that long since I have taken the time to sit at a computer and write about the mundane happenings in my life? 4 months! Well time got away from me, life got away from me. I really have no viable excuse, I was not abducted by aliens who preformed all sorts of terrible tests on me, I have not spent the last 4 months in jail for selling my last born, I have not been so involved in a sordid love affair with the young, gorgeous pool boy that all else has been forgotten ( Although if I had a pool and a young gorgeous pool boy that latter might have been the case!)
Alas what has kept me away is work and children and a lack of an Internet connection at home.

I am currently staying at my mothers house (hence the Internet connection), feeding her dogs and chickens while she is off gallivanting in Oregon with family over the holidays. My brats are at their Dads until new years and I find myself at loose ends. As a mother I am always complaining that I have no free time, I don't have time to think, breath, eat (well, okay I make time to eat obviously, or I would be about 40 lbs lighter) when I have work and kids. I have been off work for 2 days and do not have to return until next Monday, now that I have had 2 full days to eat, sleep, breath and rekindle my love affair with the Internet.......I don't really know what to do.
I should be eating bon bons, watching soap operas, painting my toenails...But I don't really like bon bons or soap operas, maybe there is something wrong with me (well something NEW I mean) I am at a complete loss of what to do with free time...what is this new concept? I suppose I will fill it with productive and healthy stuff to enrich the mind and body like........

Stuffed crust pizza and homemade pumpkin cookies, romance novels, reality TV and internet surfing until my eyeballs cross or my brain melts.
I am all about mental and physical wellness!
Krista

Hello stranger

Hello again blog, Internet, long lost friend.....I have finally carved out a little time to visit. I have been busy with work, kids, eat, sleep, repeat... but this weekend the kids are visiting their Dad. I decided with my free time I would update on recent happenings out on the farm.

My 5 year old started kindergarten Wednesday. He cried.......I cried (not in front of him, i waited until I was in the parking lot)...then I fidgeted, bit my nails and worried all day that he was feeling abandoned or lost and having some terrible life altering experience that would scar him irrevocably. I finally made it home after the longest day in history and Colin proceeded to tell me excitedly about all the things he did at school, *sigh* of relief as all of my exaggerated fears, and thoughts like: what kind of terrible mother leaves her child crying with strangers are eased....who knew?

I have had several conversations with my mother and both of my Grandmothers related to bodily functions, chicken anatomy and procreation and all that I have to look forward to as I age. (Gracefully I'm sure)

I have been informed several times over the last few months that it is time for me to start dating. My Grandmother has decided what I need is a good southern "Bubba" while the girls at work are trying to set me up with a dentist (poor innocent guy is unaware of their plans)

Lord save me from well meaning family and friends.
Amen

Hoping to blog again sometime before my children have children and I can no longer see to type. Oh how I miss the Internet.
Krista

Suggested reading....

I recently read a book that my mother had given me about 5 months ago. I had put it away in the "I'll read this one day" file and forgot about it. Last weekend I was moving around a few things in my room and came upon the book again. The Shack by William P. Young. It took me 3 days to read it cover to cover.
This story would alternately have me giggling, crying and scratching my head in confusion. It presents a relationship with God in a way I never imagined. The author intended this to be a story for his children, not theology, as I understand it. Whatever the reason I am glad it was written. It made me think, wonder, question many things I thought I knew. Whether you are interested in the authors thoughts on God or just a very interesting tale it is worth the time in reading, in my oh so humble opinion. I have decided I will need to read through it a second time to make sure I got everything....the first time I got so caught up in the story I rushed to get to the end and find out what happens, I didn't retain some of the new ideas presented.
If I find any other books, music, websites etc. that catch my eye, I will share them.....and you can share you thoughts on them with me, or suggest some interesting books, websites etc. I could pick up.

On a totally different subject, I am going to Hot Springs with my Mother and both of my Grandmothers tomorrow. If our conversation of tonight (regarding whether or not a chicken (rooster??)has a penis, as well as the species mating habits.....very funny and enlightening, thanks Mom) is any indication of what tomorrow may bring it should be a very interesting day.....I will try to blog about our outing tomorrow.
Happy reading.
Krista

Brats day out.....

My sister Alana and her little ones, Hayden and Kirra came down to the rural south from the big city last week for a visit.


On Friday we, being Alana and I, took the 4 monsters into town. Our boys needed hair cuts and Colin, with a little influence from Aunt Alana, decided he should get a Mohawk...I was a little concerned about this at first. Alana proceeded to educate me on the "faux hawk" which can be fixed to look like a Mohawk or not, so when need be we can at least appear to be a fairly normal family. Anyway....for 24 hours all I heard from Colin was how much he wanted his hair cut like this...which he referred to as a crow...he was a little confused, but very amusing when he told his little sister to keep her hands off his crow. *sigh* I love that kid. After seeing the finished product, I have to say I kinda like the crow.


On a more somber note....I have had some serious internet/computer issues lately. Still having no internet at home is slowly killing me....really, I can hardly function. And just this weekend..while trying to post a new blog.....my computer....died!! It died! and now I cannot even get it to come on. I have tried being angry and yelling at it, telling it I am sorry for all the days of overwork and the lack of care I showed, begging...you know.."come on please start, please!" (This is my treatment for anything mechanical or electronic that has revolted against me...sometimes it works, especially the begging) I wanted to weep, but for my children I carry on. I am currently going through withdrawals...it is a difficult time but I will survive. I wonder if they have a support group for this....
Krista

Fun on the farm

Over the last few weeks I have talked about moving me and my kids into a rental house on a farm....we have enjoyed it so far.

Its beautiful...and I just like being able to say I live on a farm.

And then there is this totally awesome tree!! I love it...I stare at it daily as I am driving to or from work....I will no doubt one day end up veering off the narrow drive as I stare, but I mean just look at it!



Did I mention there are cows on "our" farm...

and every time Ava sees one she proceeds to repeat cow, cow, cow momma, cow, cow, cow, cow, cow until I say; Yes...Ava..I...see..the...cow!

Last night while I was getting the kids ready for bed we could hear the cows conversing about 20-30 yards from the house...Ava thought it was great. I thought: how nice to hear the country sounds of farm living.

Around 8:30 when I had gotten both my brats into bed, the cows were still making noise...I thought: wow, I have never heard them go for so long.

Around 11 the conversation began to sound more like an argument...maybe the bull had been a little to friendly with another heifer...maybe the female had been swishing her tail at another bull..who knows, but they were getting a little loud.

When 12 rolled around I figured maybe those cows aren't so stupid....maybe they were really out there laughing and carrying on just to get on my nerves...like some kind of inconsiderate neighbors who had a party and wanted to rub in the fact that they were having a blast and I wasn't invited.

By 1:17, gone were the lovely thoughts about quiet country sounds...all I was thinking was that one day those damn cows would be served for dinner...hopefully on my table..and we would see who was laughing then wouldn't we!!! Hey, it was 1 am and I was tired.....don't judge me!

Finally around 1:30 exhaustion took over and I was able to sleep despite the clamor of my bovine neighbors....I hope they decide to take the party elsewhere tonight, I have work in the morning.

Krista

This is what happens....

when you turn your back to your children even for a moment.

I was washing dishes a few nights ago...the only sound was the low murmur of the cartoon Colin was watching, and that alone should have alerted me to the fact that my 2 year old was up to no good.

She had managed to get into my makeup and decided she needed a little blusher, although I think her skin is a little fare to pull off the black. Seeing her with my mascara across those chubby cheeks made me think.......

My God....one day, not to long from now she will want to wear makeup..........and date boys I don't like simply because I don't like them. Colin will more than likely be looking down at me and will no longer think girls are gross. He will have a drivers license and be asking to borrow the car. They will be fighting over time in the bathroom to prepare for a date instead of the most recent addition to their multitude of toys.

Oh, just thinking about my darling brats becoming unruly teenagers makes me queasy...I mean what does one do with a teenager..I never liked teenagers, not even when I was one..so surely my own offspring will annoy me to distraction. I can already hear the I hate you Mom, You ruined my life, you just don't understand... see the crazy hair styles and rebellious fashion statements...there will be sleepless nights worrying about what they are doing, where they are and who they are with. Are they safe..am I going to have to kill them when they get home because of they did something idiotic.? Will I survive this....will they?

There is soo much still to come, but I am going to try to enjoy right now and not dwell on the future........it scares me.

Krista

Missing my babies.....

As much as I enjoy my solitude and the lovely quiet when my kids are sleeping or visiting their Grandparents......I am missing them today. They have gone to their Dads house for a few days. I relished my alone time yesterday as it was the first full day my monsters were away and I was off work...but today there have been times I think it is eerily quiet in my house and I am missing the "mommy, mommy, mommy" and background noise of playing children.

So to ease my suffering (okay that may be a little dramatic) I was looking at some pictures I took last week and thought I would share a few....

I love this picture.

Krista

Ahhh, serenity.......

Nap time.........*sigh* I just love those words.
I look forward to this 2 hour slice of serenity everyday.
Those of you with children, particularly between the ages of 1-6, know what I'm talkin about.
It is the only time of the day between 7 am and 9 pm that there is anything remotely resembling quiet in my house......in my life for that matter.
Now this time can be used for anything......washing dishes, folding clothes, catching up on housework (ha!)
Usually I either sit around munching on Cheetos or chocolate (whichever is available) and watch something absolutely vital on television or read a cheesy romance novel...or, as I am doing today, playing on the Internet.
Don't get me wrong...I love my very active and raucous children, but nap time is as much for mommy's to regain sanity and self-control as it is for kids to recharge their batteries. All in all it makes everyone feel refreshed and ready to take on the rest of the day.
I am hoping by the time my children get too old for nap time I will no longer require it to make it through some days....and If I find I do....well they have to do what I say til they are 18 right...and if I want my 14 and 17 year old to nap because I am tired, or upset or just because I say so....then nap they will!!
I do realize that I may be living with delusions about the future, but hey...it makes me feel better for today, so leave me with my fantasy please.
Krista

I think my 5 year old is possessed.....

Last night I got very little sleep, for several reasons..one being the storm raging outside and all the strange spooky noises my house produced throughout the night.....the other being my 5 year old.
For some reason around midnight Colin got out of bed and walked out into the hallway.......then just stood there, swaying from side to side, looking around. Having heard him get up I went out into the hall and asked him what was wrong...Did he need to potty? He just continued swaying and looking around. He then turned and walked into the living room. I followed turned him back around and asked again if he needed to potty...to which he shook his head yes.
I directed him into the bathroom where he lifted the toilet seat, stared in a stupor for a moment then lowered the toilet seat.....he then repeated this process. At this point I am a lot confused and a little concerned. So I lifted his face and asked if he was awake...again with the head shake. Okay.....I was getting a little aggravated so I firmly told him to go potty or go to bed....Nothing!
Just stood there starting at me.
Colin then tuned and left me standing in the bathroom.....I asked where he was going...."sleep" was his response...well at least I got a word this time...he then walked into the living room. I quickly redirected him to his room telling him his bed was this way.."where"....Yay! another word..progress.
Then he laughed.....not his normal laugh but a weird almost scary he he he kinda laugh...he continued laughing for a few moments after I maneuvered him back into bed...then was once again "asleep".
Now I am more concerned than confused...and a little unsettled. It was probably nothing, but you never know.
Maybe it was some strange 5 year old joke....
Or maybe my house is haunted and he was possessed by some long dead farmers spirit who is upset because my brats have encroached upon his resting place with their loud wails, high pitched screams and constant bickering...and now he is trying to scare us away so that he can once again have peace....oh I feel your pain farmer man.
Or maybe my baby sleep walks...who knows.....all I am certain of at this point is.......................
that laugh was creepy!!
Krista

To internet or not to internet...that is the question

Sooo, I must inform you of a recent tragedy in my life......sigh......it has been very painful for me over the last week or so to deal with this atrocity.

Are you ready?

I.........have no Internet! *gasp* I know, I know...it is a terrible thing but I am trying to cope.

So right now I am at my parents house using their Internet just to update you on my absolutely thrilling life. If you have been reading my blog, you know I moved last weekend.....out into a pasture..with cows in my backyard....I'm not kidding see...

Anyway...back to my recent plight. So to the reason I have no Internet at home...No one provides DSL or any type of Internet out in the middle of nowhere.....unless you get satellite. My next logical step was to investigate satellite Internet. I was.......horrified, shocked, aghast (I love using words like that) at the price. Set up is a few hundred dollars and then I would have to pay at least 60-70 bucks a month with a 2 year contract. These numbers my not frighten some, but as a one income family this seems outrageous to me. Once I recovered from the heart attack I decided that the Internet would have to wait until I can get a better look at what my monthly bills are going to be like at my new place....then maybe I will be able to afford the freedom to surf the web at my leisure....Until then I must rely on the generosity of my Mommy...thanks mom.

Now that I have purged that annoyance (thank you for listening, I feel better) I am going to finally post a few pics of the views around my new abode.

Ohhhhhh, Ahhhhhhh

Calming yes?

Krista

Freedom

I in no way want this to seem like I am ungrateful or tired of my parents (I am very grateful for them and everything they have done for me over the past few months), but....I just found somewhere to rent! I can hardly contain my excitement!

Now I assumed that I would move into town where I work and everything would just move along from there. My parents live about 25 minutes out from my office....it is pretty rural if ya know what I mean. I have nothing against rural...I just automatically thought I would live in town....Wong. The place I have just paid the deposit and first months rent on today is in the middle of a pasture.......behind my landlords house......on a farm.
Yes...on a farm. Like there are cows 20 feet from my front door kinda farm. The land lady was kind enough to inform me ahead of time that I will get manure on my car. Ummm...ok I guess? Now the yard is fenced so I am hoping that I will not open my door and step out into a giant pile of fertilizer anytime soon..or ever...but I will be sure to keep you all updated on how that goes.

I will now be only about 10-15 minutes from work and 10 minutes from Mom and Dad so it works well. The house itself is tiny and old...but I am gonna paint and make it cute. I will take the time to put up some pictures later on. I will say that the view from my kitchen window is.........magnificent! I'll put up a pic of that too....the house is in a valley with mountains at the back *sigh* That alone is worth moving into an old farmhouse.
Krista

Turning 2

The 14th was my baby's second birthday...*sniffle*...I can hardly believe it has already been 2 years since I gave birth to her..I mean I remember it like it was yesterday...My epidural didn't work and it hurt like hell!!

She had a hello kitty party...because I like hello kitty and soon she will be old enough to choose what she wants...I am too old to have a theme party for myself *sigh* we lose so many things when we grow up...Nap time being the one I mourn the most.
Anyway....back to my baby. We made cake pops. Have you ever seen or made them? They turned out fabulous...but I am sooo very glad we did a test run a few weeks before her party...










Guess which one was from our first batch...

We did still have a few kittens that didn't quite turn out...we affectionately referred to them as Hello Kitty's mentally challenged cousins....









They tasted just as good though! We do not discriminate in my house!

I also made a cake..which I think turned out pretty good...seeing as I am in no way a culinary mastermind...or even an above average cook...I have no illusions about my lack of expertise in this area (but I do like to blame it on the fact I don't have much time to hone my talent)




















All in all I think she enjoyed her party.....














I am already brainstorming for next year...hmmm... I am sure she will love what ever I choose...I can make her think she does anyway, if only for 1 more year...because I have learned from my first born that once they turn 3 they pretty much know everything...and think they should get exactly what they want...I just can't wait! (can you hear the sarcasm?) Is it sad that I am living vicariously through my 2 year old daughter??............I didn't think so.

*No animals were harmed in the making/planning of this party/blog...thank you

Krista

She's A Maniac

She's A Maniac, Maniac on the Floor.

And She's Dancing Like She Never Danced Before.

This is what happens when my sister Casey comes to visit,

Every mommy should have a sister Casey...to occupy her children, wear them out, and give her time to regain her minuscule grasp on sanity.

Then when they get a little too rowdy...she can calm them by telling them are trees or a blade of grass in the wind...

Then there is the aftermath

Thank you God for Sisters

Krista

Day of pampering...continued

Well I finally went back for my massage this Friday.....I know I must be crazy right?? But I made it out alive. Now before I go into the massage itself I would like to discuss my fear......of undressing and remaining naked (even if covered by a sheet) in front of someone I don't know. Having children, breast feeding, years in an unhappy marriage (gained weight) and filing for divorce (gained more weight) have left my body a little.......depressed (I apologize to any males who happen upon my blog...very sorry), but I think even if I had a perfect body this would still freak me out. Is it just me??
The massage lady was very friendly, trying to put me at ease as I was a massage virgin. She explained how she would work and the order of areas she would massage. At one point she stated that the abdomen was an optional area....Ummmm..NO! She said she didn't have it done herself because she had kids and stretch marks and she was self conscious....I have to say she was like 5'4 and 110 lbs (not saying she cant be self conscious) but I wanted to say..Thanks hun, but I don't really think you can relate. But being the peaceable soul I am, I just politely declined having my tummy rubbed.
The MT stepped out so I could undress and get comfortable..yeah right. I undressed as quickly as I could, ripping clothes off and throwing them into a pile on the bench, my eyes locked on the door the entire time. I jumped onto the table and quickly covered with the sheet...I'm sure I set some kind of record.

I was so nervous about the sheet slipping or sliding and some random part of my body popping into view that it took me awhile to relax and enjoy the massage. I started on my back and she was working her way from head to toe...as she lifted my arms to massage I suddenly thought......Did all the running about getting undressed and freaking out about being nude make me all sweaty and gross?? God I hope not....I would be sooo embarrassed. I prayed through out the whole first half of the massage that she wouldn't accidentally pull the sheet to far over, that I wasn't sweating a river and that my feet didn't smell. Once we got to the point were I could lay on my tummy I was finally able to relax and enjoy.

Despite the horror of my last visit to the salon *shudder* and my fear of flashing the poor woman I think it was worth braving....and maybe I will be able to go back..as long as I keep seeing the same lady...I may be comfortable enough in a few or 20 eons to enjoy the whole experience.
Krista

Bad Mommy

I was e-mailing with my sister yesterday and she mentioned feeling a little inadequate as a mommy because she needed some help with her 1 year old twins while they were sick (she, of course, is a wonderful mother) I think all moms probably feel inadequate at times...like they let things happen or let their kids get away with something they shouldn't..if they need a little help when things get rough...they can't be Supermom. I know I have my shortcomings, in all areas. But my brats are fed, clothed, happy and loved...that makes it a little easier to accept the fact that I am not Supermom. Besides I think that some of the....adventures and situations my kids get into, when I am too tired or distracted to be Supermom, build character and curiosity..teach them lessons
Like right after I gave birth to Ava, Colin was 3 and mischievous. He liked to try to get outside and play without asking mommy, I was feeding Ava in the other room while he was supposed to be watching tv, suddenly it was very very quiet...that is never a good sign.. so I went on the hunt for my munchkin. I couldn't find him...I became frantic...ran outside yelling his name only to realize he had managed to lock himself in the back seat of my car (don't worry he was only there a few minutes). Not one of my shining moments..but he never attempted to go outside and play by himself again...Lesson Learned.

others are just funny, embarrassing or....disgusting...

I made spaghetti for dinner last night, it was a hit. While I was cooking I looked over to see Colin sticking an uncooked noodle up his nose. He found this hilarious, I think it was disgusting. Now I should probably do something to hinder this behavior as it will no doubt lead to an ER visit in the future..but I couldn't help but laugh with him...and I can't reprimand him while I'm giggling. If I was Supermom I may miss out on some of these moments...and I wouldn't give them up for anything.......not perfectly behaved children, no messes, no crying, no throwing of food or spilling of milk...no pushing and fighting over toys...no laughing at crazy things my 5 year old repeats or faces my 2 year old makes...................how boring!!

Nobody is perfect...and I know I can't pull off Supermom....but I love and laugh with my kids, so I'll take my life over perfection any day.
Krista

Why do we say such things?

Have you ever wondered where certain phrases or sayings came from? I do. I am sure that at some point in history these sayings were relevant or at least the people using them knew why they were used in the context they are. Most people however, do not know the origin of these expressions. Which brings me back to..why do we use sayings that do not make sense to us...or maybe it's just me.

Happy as a clam...are clams happy?...can they physiologically feel emotions?...and if so, should we really be eating them??

A basket case...I know what this means..but logically isn't this a case for a basket? That is a little redundant yes?

By the skin of your teeth...eewww..I mean.....just eewww

Cold turkey...Yum, cold turkey sandwiches the day after thanksgiving..mmmm....oh, sorry I got distracted. I love food.

Get your dander up....huh? dander...like pet dander or dandruff? I guess it would be aggravating if your dandruff was up...*shrug*

To hell in a hand basket...There are probably worse ways to get to hell, but that would still be pretty uncomfortable..who is carrying the basket? are they swinging it while they walk...I may get motion sickness(it would have to be someone big and strong carrying a ginormous basket to hoist my heavy behind!)

Mind your P's and Q's....be on your best behavior....what do letters have to do with my behavior? Am I being graded?? Will there be a test? I didn't even study!

The whole 9 yards....9 yards, that's like 27 feet right?(math was never my strongest subject) It really isn't that far. I don't think that is much to be proud of. Now if it was the whole 9,000 yards, there is something to brag about.

Just some random thoughts I wanted to share. There are thousands of other sayings and phrases I don't quite understand...but then again I can be a little slow catching on sometimes, so if you know how these relate to the way we use them, please enlighten me.(I hate being the last to know)

Krista

Day of pampering??

My lovely mother bought me a day of pampering at a local salon (in town of 5,000 there are only 1 or 2) to include highlights, cut and style and a 1 hour massage. Thanks Mom!

I arrived at the salon at 9 am for my massage appointment which by some fluke (or someones complete ignorance) was not on the schedule. They offered to do my highlights first then the massage at 10. Whatever, it didn't matter to me.

I sat down at the stylist station which was covered in products, hairdryers, scissors, combs and foils. Okay so she is not a neat freak...should this concern me? It does.

The stylist began cleaning off her station and preparing for my color. My hair is sectioned off, you know how they do with all those clips, and I look perfectly ridiculous. She takes her materials to get the color ready and I am thinking.. umm don't you need to ask me what color or something. I have never had highlights but there are different colors right?? So, trying not to sound like a complete moron I ask how I choose a color, is it just one that's a little lighter than my natural? Her response : They will be blond.
Excuse me?? What kind of blond exactly, I ask. In answer she shows me a picture of woman with medium brown hair like mine that had huge chunks of bright blond almost white hair throughout.

Are you freaking kidding me??? No way!! Of all the thought running through my head I only allow "I don't think I want THAT blond" to leave my mouth. The girl just stood there staring at me a moment, like I was the crazy one. Just as I was about to give in to my fight or flight response (that had kicked in upon seeing the picture) and run...she gave me a few other options. Once I had decided on a color that wouldn't leave me looking like a skunk we got started.

Or we would have if she wasn't so busy texting and answering her cell phone (which she also did throughout my whole appointment) How dare I intrude on her phone time at work!

Eventually she got started with the foil and comb applying the highlights at a rate f 1 every 19.5 minutes..I had like a million of these. Do you realize how long this took?! Needless to say, when 10 rolled around my head was covered in white goop and purple gum wrappers so I had to reschedule my massage. *sigh*

When the stylist finally finished the highlights (like 40 hours later) I was taken to sit under one of those hair dryer thingys...I sat on a small wooden chair that was pulled over under the machine. After about 5 minutes both my back and bum were complaining. 10 minutes later, just when I thought I couldn't take anymore and my bum was screaming complaints I was finally allowed up from my stylist induced torture.

Time to remove the gum wrappers from my head, wash, cut and style. Whew almost done and my stomach is only slightly rolling and my head only aches a little after 2 plus hours of chemicals and my stylists questionable knowledge.

I requested that she just trim and layer my hair... not much of a change. As she cut I caught glimpses of my hair in the mirror and the rolling in my stomach became a furious boil. Oh God, Oh God it looks orangy and I am wondering...what did I have for breakfast and how hard will it be to clean from the floor and this smock?

While I focused on keeping down my breakfast the stylist finishes my hair. I am afraid to look. Then the stylist says...
"Come outside to look because the light in here at my station is really really bad"

Lord help me...she has just cut and colored my hair and she couldn't even see!!?? I am going to be sick. My hair is probably butchered and bright orange! What am I going to do, how can I fix this??

Luckily, before I could have a complete meltdown we step outside, she hands me the mirror and after a few deep breaths I look.

And nearly faint in relief...even though it took 3 plus hours and certain parts of my body are still recovering, the final result was good. Not fantastic and not good enough to make me come back and endure this process EVER again..but good.

The stylist should consider herself lucky. If my hair had not come out looking at least ok, I would have either screamed, cried or shared my breakfast with her...maybe all three.

I will be going back next Friday for the massage. I will let you know how that goes.....If I survive.
Krista

Devil Cat

My children and I are staying with my Mom and Dad since we just moved here 3 weeks ago. Now that I am working I hope to have us moved by May. That is neither here nor there, just background on why I am sleeping at my mother's house.......

My mother has a cat....A Devil cat. She will not leave me alone! During the day she is the perfect feline but once the moon rises she becomes Heidi the malicious, beastly devil cat. She is evil. She comes into my room in the middle of the night and pounces on me, meows in my face and uses me as a scratching/rubbing post. I can throw her out and across the room, but she just comes back.....She is dense as well as evil.

Now to fully comprehend how seriously this affects me I must first enlighten you about my love of sleep. *sigh* If sleep were a man I would love honor and cherish him, I would marry him and be deliriously happy for the rest of my days...we could have little nap babies.

Alas sleep is not a man so I must continue in my day to day life and try to find a man I will love as much as sleep.......though that is not likely to happen.

So from this point on Heidi, the devil cat, is now banned from my room at night as she is intruding on my time with one of my true loves. (I have several we may visit at a later time)

Don't let the cute and innocent face fool you...

She is vicious!

Krista

This is my life..

Wake up before dawn
Children screaming, fighting, running
A million things to do today
Get up and go to work
10 hour days...patients complaining
You're not moving fast enough, I want this and I want that
Doctors yelling, patients swearing
running, running, I can't catch up

This is my life???

Mommy she bit me
Brother pushing, wails and tears, fits and fights
Food thrown from here to there
Dirty hands, dirty faces, dirty diapers
Fingers tugging, voices whining
Mommy, mommy, MOMMY....can't catch my breath

This is my life???

Papers signed, alone now with 2 children
Bills to pay, clothes to buy, meals to cook
Baths to give, fights to resolve, plans to make
Visitation with their father
Mommy mommy I want this, I need that...can we, can we please
Not enough time, not enough money, not enough me

This is my life???

Sleepy eyes in the morning
Warm hugs and sweet kisses
Band aids on boo boos, stories before bed
Birthdays and Christmastime
Bright smiles and funny stories
Mommy, mommy, MOMMY....
Mommy, I love you

This is my life.................and I'm okay with that.

Krista

Migration

So I am now 2 days into my new job.....and it is going surprisingly well. I managed to show up on time and fully clothed. Thank God. I did not forget all my training and experience, and I think I managed to make a good impression on my coworkers and supervisor. They just don't know me very well yet. Thankfully the pterodactyls in my tummy have migrated out to make room for the butterflies that only flutter on occasion. I am hoping by the end of next week all things flying, flapping and fluttering will have vacated my belly.

Here are a few random pictures just because......

Aren't my babies adorable!!

Krista

Pterodactyls in my tummy

I went for a job interview yesterday and was called back an offered the position within 2 hours...I'm just that good (kidding). But now I am sitting here thinking about the fact that I am starting a new job tomorrow and I feel like I have pterodactyls flapping wildly in my tummy. Any time I begin something new and unknown it always freaks me out a little. All the embarrassing on the job stories I have heard revolve unwanted in my brain. What if.......

I oversleep and have to run around like a lunatic to get ready, race there and get a ticket on the way (that would be my bad luck) and am dismissed from my new position before it has begun because I am punctually challenged. (is punctually a word?)

I arrive at work and suddenly realize while I have on my top I have somehow forgotten my pants....you know you have had this dream, It is terrifying. Just thinking about this possibility makes my stomach ache.

I find once I get there that I have forgotten everything I learned in college and at my previous jobs and just stand around looking like a ninny saying uhhh, ummm and yea alot. I seem to become inarticulate when I'm flustered.

These scenarios and so many more could happen!! Do you think I could be overreacting?......me neither.

Krista

Tears and Giggles

Let me share with you my baby's reaction to Americas funniest home videos. A few nights ago apparently there was a lack of anything worth while on television because we ended up watching AFV. Now every time some idiot did something stupid we would all laugh....except Ava, she would look over, bottom lip trembling and begin to wail.



She would soon recover but almost immediately some other dimwit would fall, crash or wound themselves in some way and again came the waterworks. I am unsure if my tot just has a huge well of empathy or if this was a normal reaction to being forced to sit through an entire hour of cheesy one liners and unamusing segues into each clip.......I'm leaning toward the latter. There were moments I wanted to bawl myself.
Krista